We are the definition of "extreme," right?

The Katz family, you might be interested to hear, has applied for a new home on the TV Program Extreme Home Makeover. As I said to Avrum, I'm not quite sure we are the kind of family they are looking for. I think we're so ridiculous, they'd have to pick us ... except maybe they’re looking for a family that accidentally hit hard times due to unforeseen and tragic circumstances, rather than folks who blithely ran headlong into hard times counting on the lottery to save them from themselves because they wanted to be able to grow potatoes.

Still, we retain a sense of humor, which surely works in our favor, and we are at least decent people with , umm, lofty ideals. We're honest-to-goodness going to apply to be foster parents if we ever have a spare bedroom. I've got a few ideas in my head about non-profit groups I'd like to start to get food -- good quality food, nutritious food, grown locally-- to homebound seniors and families with small children.

Here's what I sent in our five-sentence application, due the 11th. We're having fantasies about the off-grid 2,500 square foot adobe they will build. I"m hoping we can convince them to also build a 1,000 square foot root cellar and a nice goat barn.

"THE KATZ FAMILY

Avrum Katz, dad, age 48, public school teacher and farmer
Kristen Davenport Katz, mom, 35, freelance writer and farmer
Nik Katz, age 12, Avrum’s son from 1st marriage
Ella Grace Katz, age 3
Silas Katz, age 2
Plus 3 dogs, 2 cats, 20 goats, 6 rabbits & 30-something chickens

We are organic market farmers living in a 100-year-old adobe house on 32 mountain acres near Taos, New Mexico -- a remarkably beautiful piece of earth good for growing organic vegetables. But the house has no running water, no bathroom, rotting floors, and a foundation built of river rock. Right now the house is not entirely habitable, and we are sleeping in an old converted boxcar on the property while we work on the house, but we have run out of money and time. We have a composting outhouse, and our bathtub (fed with irrigation ditch water) is out under the blue sky – and drains to our potato patch. But, we are panicked: Winter is coming and we’re worried about how we’re going to make it during the cold months when our ditch freezes."

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